gastroscopy

How it goes.

Past three years, I’ve been through gastroscopy in order to find out the inner part of my stomach. a year after the procedure I’ve been told by the specialist that there’s redness around my stomach from what they’ve seen through the scope.

I’ve been treated as GERD patient and the drugs, proton pump inhibitor. I didn’t take it as well as advised. Until I’ve been change to ganathon 50mg three times a day. Those completely mess with me as well, haha. The last drugs that I depend on. The doctor said that I have to continuously taking it daily, like seriously. And so I still wanna feeling like healthy person, so I don’t take it until now I got the last warn from them, the medist. I got myself laugh.

And the follow up this month, I have to make sure that I take it regularly before the doctor blow up, haha.

If the drugs doesn’t make any sense, they gonna run second gastroscopy soon. And sincerely, that will kill me man. Let’s take a look what my first scope are like..

Actually, I’ve been writing this year ago in my past post.

It was nothing, but annoying little operation. I’ve been told that there’s no harm in the procedure. Yeah, as well as I knew. But to be honest, it scared me a lil bit.

As I was lying on the bed. They, the doctor and nurses surround me was horribly made me uneasy. I’ve been injected with sleeping drugs, but I am still half awake.

And they put transparent oxygenated tube through my nose and the pulse oximeter on my right hand as usual.

She said ‘as you are asthma we put this to prevent the lack of oxygen for you’ and I felt tickles in my noses. Am not breathing well, tho. The doctors made my pulse oximeter works even better. Duh, I’m nervous. I believe that they gonna think that I’m nervous due to my rapid pulse, but it’s not. It’s infected.

I can’t even barely breathe as the doctor came towards me and I was half awake, my eyes are no longer wide opened. I am sleepy but urge to open my eyes.

The doctor put the long tube in my mouth and I felt that the tube find it way through my stomach. Name it, it’s uncomfort, it’s uneasy and so on.

Apparently my right hand was hurt about the injection and the pulse oximeter wire that mess with the needle in my hand.

I felt like vomit. Then I pushed the doctor’s arm away. The nurses hold almost all part of my body. My legs, my hand and my shoulder. My painful right hand pulled the doctor’s cloth and then the nurses said ‘syahirah, jangan tarik baju doctor nanti tertanggal, tahan sikit ya’

And I was like, I don’t care nurses, doctor please stop. But they didn’t hear me cause I can’t talk. My mouth filled with so much tube as I was conscious.

Then during the cloth’s pulling session, I was finally really sleepy and after the procedure done I slept in the ward for hours.

There’s no harm but it get my claustrophobia active. That’s why I scared of scope things.

But the best thing about my story is I was conscious that I gonna have to do laparoscopy sooner or later, Haha. there’s no other way out I can go. I am never willing to see the doctor anyway although the medist suggested to. But last month I did, for the sake of myself, maybe? Haha

 he was the one who find it a way for me to go to the specialist. And so I went. That’s the things then. I am waiting for my future scope again.

Apparently, pain demands to be felt.

For those who has been diagnosed, it was always better to have your prescribed drugs as advised unless you are me. Haha

That’s all about gastroscopy. I am looking forward for anxiety in the next post.

That’s all. 

Assalamualaikum, hi!
today I'm not gonna talk about anything but myself.
since I found that I'd lost interest in posting anything except this.
so sorry that anyone may have found it's not easy for you to read this, or annoy anyone.
I just cannot think of anything else but this.
sorry, pain demands to be felt huh? :)

Just in my last post I do talk about gastritis. but now, it's more important thing I guess. duh, I don't know, but both are really important, nope, it's all important.
just past year ago I was 20 when they found it. I started to take NSAID as result. and so I went, my gastritis getting worsen due to the drugs, but it kind of help to my nerve. I got no choice except for bearing with the pain and shut the drug closed in the box.
and I was switched to some anti-epilectic or anti-depressants as result, comes with vitamin for nerves.
it works by slowing down impulses in the brain. it is used to treat fibromyalgia or any other neurophathic pain associated with spinal cord injury.

you know that I trying hard to figure out myself while taking the drugs. it's always said in the article that 'you may thought about suicide while taking this drugs' and yeah it works in me. i don't know how many times do I have to fight myself when my body shaking and the suicidal keep flashing my mind.
total perk!

Call your doctor at once if you have any new or worsening symptoms such as: mood or behavior changes, depression, anxiety, insomnia, or if you feel agitated, hostile, restless, hyperactive (mentally or physically), or have thoughts about suicide or hurting yourself.

unfortunately, this happened to me and the doctor stop the drugs and I am back taking the old drugs which I thought of same side effect too, but lighter than that one I've been switched of.
still am, heavy dizziness, muscle weakness, memory problem and loss focus.
depression is always the side effect as well.

but the most difficult part is that I'd memory problem, mood changes and thinking problem. and not to forget skin rashes. bad one. haha
I've been told that I kind of loss my ability to drive. the medline always said that patient on this drugs cannot drive until the doctor confirmed that you are free from the drugs.
but I have no choice again, I have to drive on my own. so as the resullt, I am so embarrassed that I drive like a drunk man.
you know that sometimes I don't even realized that I am on the middle on the road which I cross the border line. you imagine, to drive at the middle of the road? not in the right lane or left lane but middle. total sucks!
and most of the time when I'm driving I'm not actually really driving but hallucinating. nope, I don't think of anything or want to think of it. but somehow my brain are at failure to gave attention to the driving.
always, I don't see in front of my car but I look at the road. yes, I mean the road, the place my tyre pampered themselves!
I am also almost hit the other car. I am sometimes what people said 'ikut rapat rapat' with the car in front of mine. then I get back to my hallucination and when they brake I don't even realized until it almost get to hit the car. pretty sick!

but lately, I found myself in pretty depression. nope I have no problem but my brain fog works well. my best friend told me this few weeks as we go out together that I am pretty crazy.
firstly I thought that just a normal joke. but then I realized when I can't get myself shut up in the car mostly. I don't even feeling like driving, I don't focus on my driving instead of I keep singing, dancing or babbling in the car myself. I started to think that it's just not me. I go extraordinary nowadays. my friend noticed that. and I also noticed that it's hard to handle myself.
I keep doing unusual things. such as walk in a circle, babbling and so on. I don't even noticed or giving attention to people near me or sometimes I stare at a thing, a long stare, thinking of nothing.

I don't know what happened but it's hurts so much.
I could always ask for a beautiful day and days.
I may have prayed that I gonna heal soon.
and gonna live my beautiful life with the husband and children :') haha
fkr, I love you, always :)